Full written responses for questions that required an explanation

Q3. How is your singleness impacting your relationship with God?

  1. It makes me want to build my relationship with God first before pursing anything
  2. My relationship with God continues to grow. Being single has a positive impact on my walk with the Lord.
  3. Don’t think it does anyway
  4. It’s not , if anything it has taught me to get closer to him and strengthen me in my walk with him.
  5. It has been good
  6. Draws me closer to Him
  7. Wonderful we have a great relationship .
  8. Teaching me to wait
  9. Gives me more time with him alone. It helps me to grow more
  10. I’m being patient for God to bless me with my ideal spouse.
  11. I try to spend time reasoning with him and just expressing my struggles with life and my personal goals. I don’t mind being single.
  12. Sometimes smooth sailing. Somtimes challenging.
  13. It makes more more cognizant of Him and His presence
  14. My relationship with God has improved because of my wholeness in in my singleness
  15. Positively… Look to HIM for constant support
  16. I have learnt through the years to draw closer to God and to trust Him.
  17. Good because I have a better relationship with Good
  18. I have more time to focus on my relationship with the Lord
  19. It has its days, when married Christian friends treat you like a lesser woman
  20. i get closer to God
  21. I have more time to spend with the Lord and when called to ministry I’m readily available
  22. Positively
  23. I haven’t really given it much thought…I love being a child of God…
  24. I am trying to encourage myself that as a single lady I have more time and energy to focus on God. The reality though is many times that I feel like not being as good as other Christian women that are married, and it is sometimes difficult to get out of thinking like there is something wrong in me or something lacking.
  25. It helps me to stay focus on the things of God.
  26. Very great
  27. I just focus on the things that are important
  28. Yes
  29. Made my relationship with God stronger.
  30. Has helped me to be more disciplined with my relationship with him.
  31. More focused and more time to seek God
  32. Últimamente he dudado de que Dios tenga a una persona para mi, y me hace sentir molesta con Dios
  33. It is impacting me by spending more time with God and getting prepared for what God has in store for my life.
  34. I think I am more consciously committed to serving God
  35. It truthfully allows me to spend more time intimately with God.
  36. I am more intimate with God, I think, because of my singleness
  37. More commitment in service to God
  38. better time with God
  39. I seek answers and try not to be sad about it.
  40. It allows me to focus more on my relationship with God. I am getting to know the Lord in an intimate way. Just having many precious moments with the father.
  41. It has negatively impacted me where I drew a little distant
  42. My singleness makes me rely on God more.
  43. Struggling with sexual sin has caused me to not grow spiritually. I have realized that I need to choose to trust in the Lord above all
  44. Mixed
  45. No special way
  46. It can be a distraction at times as the lust of the flesh may come into play and it is not always easy to walk away from temptation. However, I also believe that it gives me an advantage to spend more time with God as there are no marital duties to attend to.
  47. He comes first in my life and this helps me to serve Him more
  48. I am able to be more involved with church activities
  49. Does not affect my relationship with God
  50. I sometimes believe God doesn’t care that I am alone and very lonely.
  51. Trying to figure out how to navigate my life as a proud feminist/independent woman alongside the the tendency for the church to perpetuate limiting ideas of what a woman can be in ways that make her less than/incomplete unless she is married. I don’t necessarily agree. With that said, being single hasn’t really impacted my relationship with God, but Christians.
  52. I am who I am in Christ. My commitment to Him has nothing to do with my marital status. I hope to get married as it has to do with my purpose in life. Being unmarried and single minded affords me the time and space to develop my relationship with the Lord without the clutter of responsibilities to immediate family. Any defaults cannot be blamed on family responsibility.
  53. I dont know that it does. I was angry at God for a time because He was supposed to show me the right man. But now I know it was my fault I ended up single, i wasnt listening to Him and i wasnt praying correctly. Im also not following the rules of remaining “pure” and mayb that is against what God believes but its not something I believe I will change
  54. It is mixed. Trusting God and also feeling the struggle of wondering if it will ever happen
  55. Used to because sex was a need. However, I no longer focus on sex. I am now focusing on being a better and healthier person.
  56. It is an advantage since I am not restricted
  57. There is a feeling of hopelessness and loneliness that God just does not seem to understand or enter.
  58. I have all the time to be with God.
  59. It has impacted my relationship with God in a positive way. I get to spend adequate time in fellowship, worship and service
  60. It sometimes makes me angry at God because I have to endure all the things I ho through on my own. Because it is often in these times that God is quiet. I know that He is teaching me lessons but it doesn’t stop the anger and sadness of being alone
  61. I have learnt through the years to draw closer to God and to trust Him completely especially with matters of the heart.
  62. I trust Him for everything and anything. He is my sole companion
  63. The Lord has used this time of unmarriedness to prepare me for marriage but even more importantly to expand my heart towards him. I’ve learned to trust and lean on the Lord. I’ve experienced his goodness, mercy and faithfulness. He’s taught me to be honest with him and has been dealing with clarifying/solidifying my identity in him. Isaiah 43:1 has come to mean so much to me and I receive it as a personal promise and decree from the Lord that gives me the utmost security in Him.
  64. My singleness has cause me to draw closer to the Lord and it has also caused my to know and understand what it means to honour the temple of the living God.
  65. Been single allow me more time getting closer with my God
  66. I have more time at hand for a deeper and intimate relationship
  67. I am able to spend time in true adoration of the Most High, Yahweh

Q5. What strategies do you use to maintain your chastity while single?

  1. Listen to God and the fact that I want a man after God’s own heart
  2. Boundaries, non negotiables, accountability partners.
  3. Praying and to avoid certain situations
  4. Being in prayer groups. Read the Bible, read Christian books as well. Listen to elders as well how the maintain there marriage for 50years.
  5. Church activities
  6. Pray, pray, pray
  7. The word of God and my relationship with him.
  8. Reading and believing God’s word and having Godly friends/accountability partners
  9. Spending intimate time with God
  10. Pray to God for both my spouse and I so that we’re an ideal match❕
  11. Doing the things that I enjoy and that makes me happy
  12. Try to stay busy.
  13. Avoid films, conversations and print media that shows, speaks or prints anything that triggers my deep seated sexual emotions
  14. Prayer, Reading the word, serving and community
  15. Keep things simple.. I will die if I don’t eat or drink.. but I won’t die from not having sex
  16. I do not engage in any activity that may lead to temptation and like Joseph I run away from advances whenever I am placed in an unexpected situation.
  17. Reading my Bible and prayerful
  18. No strategy
  19. I work alot and volunteer in a few organizations
  20. immerse myself in ministry and share good friendship
  21. avoid conversations that lead to that side.. stay away from triggers like certain shows, books, songs. Have a verse ready at the back of my mind.
  22. Always occupied or using time constructively, also avoid any compromising situations; therefore, it is not difficult to maintain chastity.
  23. Nothing special….I have very little interest in sex.
  24. It is a struggle, and sometimes I have found myself in compromising/dangerous situations. The full avoidance/ignorance of single men, especially non-Christian, is the strategy that I have been using the recent times, yet it also creates a level of resentment.
  25. Listening to worship songs, reading my Bible and devotionals
  26. Have support groups, focus on God and apply the word of God
  27. Watch videos on relationships and read books
  28. Focus on things that makes me happy
  29. I stick to my values.
  30. Spending time with friends and doing things I love
  31. The fear of God
  32. Ninguna , no tengo problema con ese tema y no es algo que ocupe mi tiempo ,simplemente lo ignoro
  33. By being present in the moment and cherish the time i spend with family and love ones
  34. I make sure I am never in a position/place where I can compromise
  35. Focus on my purpose and stay involved in serving others .
  36. Abstainance, keep my mind pure & on God. I pull down every thought that is contrary to His word.
  37. Work for the Lord being focused on His business
  38. pray dance read
  39. I do not maintain it
  40. Maintaining intimacy and closeness with God and more time in his word, reminding myself that my body belongs to him. Also accountability partners and surrounding myself with women who know how to pray me through.
  41. I don’t go out with any guy who seems to only just want sex
  42. Stay in the Word of God and avoid people and situations that may cause me to fall.
  43. Accountable partner
  44. Prayer
  45. I do think about it much
  46. I sometimes, not all the time, pray and ask the Lord for strength to overcome or endure whichever temptation comes my way.
  47. Being mindful of the sins that so easily besets me. Don’t put myself in situations where the temptation is going SEEM unavoidable.
  48. Consult with persons who are mature in the faith who can advise me because they are experienced.
  49. I also share with peers of similar status so we can encourage each other realising we are not alone on this journey.
  50. Word, prayer and service to God
  51. Get involve, work project, church committee, my start-up business
  52. Not to date men who are not holy spirit filled
  53. No need to worry about it, no one looks my way.
  54. I can’t say that this has been a priority. but, the pandemic certainly leaves me no choice.
  55. I don’t know that I have a strategy but not trying out relationships with men certainly helps. I have been, done that and don’t want to be there again. I have dealt with some generational iniquities as the Lord revealed them.
  56. The thing is not to trust your flesh. Don’t test yourself! Ask for help if you need to. Because you resisted and overcame in last situation doesn’t means that it must happen the same way next time. Don’t be dtupid and don’t put yourself in compromising situation!
  57. Im not
  58. Continue to be self aware, not give in to beating up myself when thoughts come, invite God into places of struggle( this one is very hard)
  59. Get involved in community activities and practise self-love. Pray to God for deliverance.
  60. I don’t really have a particular strategy
  61. There is no issue, no one even sees me.
  62. Just keep active in the word.
  63. I enjoy my singleness
  64. It is hard especially at this age since when men approach you, that’s what they want. But I work alot
  65. I do not put myself in situations where I can be tempted and like Joseph I run away from all advances. God always provides a way out.
  66. I set boundaries and I remain honest about my feelings to the Lord, and to others.
  67. It’s so important to guard your heart in this hour. I’m careful regarding what I watch. I surround myself with those who hold me accountable. Honestly, I made a commitment to the Lord years ago that I would not “date” and that
  68. I would remain chaste. It is by his sovereign hand I’ve done so.
  69. I remain active in acquiring knowledge and also establishing rules and boundaries through the word of God. I also spend time in the presence of the Lord in order for him to direct my path and lead my in all truth
  70. I try to involve myself in things that doesn’t remind me that I am single….I try to refocus that energy into read my bible more
  71. I do not put myself in a position of temptations.
  72. Focus on the word, the Torah as an Henrew Israelite Sabbath Keeper following the commandments.

Any further comments based on your answers above?

  1. No
  2. Singleness is a gift use it to minister while you have.
  3. Because I am single I get to do more for God
  4. I am one of those who really like being single….if a husband came along I would deal with him the best I can….if he doesn’t I’m still good.
  5. It seems that married people are automatically seen as more mature Christians and their function in the church is acknowledged. Yet, single women are seen as ones growing.
  6. Singleness is not negative so let’s applaud our singleness and enjoy it.
  7. I said ‘no’ to #6, but I believe there should be a third choice – ‘don’t really know’ (because I really don’t know!)
  8. Don’t seem to have that embrace in family units as a single. It doesn’t register that the person would love to be around families and be included in their activities and functions
  9. thank you for this survey
  10. The community that I’m apart of now has not taken my singleness for granted. There is better support here than I’ve experienced before.
  11. Church community could do more to create ministerial support for singles
  12. I don’t think it’s singleness that has impacted my relationship with the Lord but my lack of trust in Him and sin.
  13. Sometimes I dream being married
  14. It is not a curse to be single though it is the will of God for everyone to have a mate.
  15. I hope that the church can make room for various ways for women to be. As it stands, you aren’t really fully recognized as such unless you have a husband by your side to validate that. Might we raise young christian girls and empower single women to be ok with that status and maybe lead their lives in ways where seeking a life partner isn’t a main priority and let God handle that? Perhaps, we can use just as much energy as we use to prioritize marriage and also teach women to understand that as long as they have God, they lack nothing. A Husband will not make you whole, that’s God’s job.
  16. Regarding the last question, yes or no doesn’t really give you a real to an either or situation. I am not treated specially because of my unmarried status. It could be that it is taken for granted. I don’t depend on church community for many thing. Within the community and the body of Christ at large I have trustworthy friends ( married and single) that I can confide in and lean on. God has blessed me that way!
  17. Our life isa God-life married or single. Everything plays its part in producing in you what God requires. People are Important to God! Christ is building what we call church. Ware the Living stones that he uses. It’s great!
  18. I live the life I love and I love the life I live.
  19. I think singleness is a gift, we should cherish it
  20. I have taken advantage of, excluded, disrespected because I have no male backing.
  21. When singleness is a choice, it is easier. However, when it is not, the journey can be difficult. Either way, the Lord shows up big time when we rely on Him.
  22. I would like to clarify that I checked Independent, but I’m a Christian (Kingdom Believer). I haven’t necessarily been treated differently by the spiritual community but I will say I don’t believe the issue of unmarriedness is a priority in the Christian Community therefore many unmarrieds feel forgotten or sometimes hopeless. The Lord designed marriage and family. We are in a time when this is not honored. It is a critical part of stabilizing and strengthening communities and nations.
  23. Singleness is not a curse, I actually see it has a gift that I didn’t realise that I needed until I was in it. Through singleness God allowed me to see my worth, my purpose and my self esteem. I have been in three serious relationships before accepting Christ has my Lord and Saviour and it is through singleness I realised that though they were different men they were the same. Through singleness I have been delivered from soul ties, low self esteem and shame. It is through singleness I now understand Proverbs 31
  24. Not at this time
  25. I am following the Torah, the laws, commandments are my guidelines and coming out of any idolatry pagan worship like, Easter and Christmas, Valentines Day etc. I know who I am and will not be unequally yoked for the sake of a partner.

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